Jewish Humor Central is a blog to start your day with news of the Jewish world that's likely to produce a knowing smile and some Yiddishe nachas. It's also a collection of sources of Jewish humor--anything that brings a grin, chuckle, laugh, guffaw, or just a warm feeling to readers.
Our posts include jokes, satire, books, music, films, videos, food, Unbelievable But True, and In the News. Some are new, and some are classics. We post every morning, Sunday through Friday. Enjoy!
As the State of Israel began the holiday of Rosh Hashanah on Sunday eve,
the Israel Defense Forces (IDF) was ready to give thousands of soldiers
a festive feast on their bases.
According to IDF figures, those
staying on duty over the holiday were to be fed a total of six tons of
fish, 18 tons of turkey, 16 tons of chicken, and 7.5 tons of beef, all
washed down with 9,500 bottles of soft drinks. In keeping with the
holiday custom, 25 tons of apples were to be dipped into two tons of
honey to symbolize a sweet new year.
Toasts made with 7,000
bottles of grape juice were to be raised by soldiers on bases across the
country. Also to be devoured: three tons of dried fruit, five and half
tons of pomegranates and six tons of dates, rounded off with six tons of
honey cake. In this video, young Jewish soldiers from Israel and those who made aliyah from the USA, Canada, Holland, Guatemala, Brazil, Ukraine, and the United Kingdom, express their wishes for a Happy New Year. Shana Tova from Jerusalem! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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...and SHANA TOVAH WITH BIG THANKS TO ALL OF YOU WONDERFUL SOLDIERS, MAY GOD AND ALL THE POWERS THAT BE PROTECT YOU FROM OUR BLOODY ENEMIES. MAY YOU DEFEAT THEM WITHOUT SHEDDING YOUR OWN BLOOD. AMEN....
If You Like Jewish Humor Central You'll Love Al's Hour-long Lecture - Jewish Humor on Your Desktop
...Now Available for Your JCC, Synagogue, or Organization Al's lectures on Jewish humor are coming to synagogues, JCCs and private clubs in a series of one-hour talks illustrated with video clips. So far this year Al has brought his brand of Jewish humor to audiences in Pennsylvania, Florida, New Jersey, and Jerusalem. This summer he will be entertaining at Kutsher's and other Catskill resorts. If you want to bring these fun lectures to your community in 2013 and 2014, contact Al at 201-796-9273 or akustan at gmail.com. Lecture topics are: 1. Jewish Humor on Your Desktop: A Whole Lot More Than Catskills Comedy 2. Israel is a Funny Country 3. Humor in Jewish Life (You Can't Make This Stuff Up) 4. Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places 5. Yiddish is a Funny Language 6. Jewish Holiday Hilarity 7. Yiddishe Nachas. These lectures are designed to enrich programs at resort hotels and cruise ships as well. Call now to book a date.
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - Now Available in eBook and Paperback at Amazon.com
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - More than 400 video clips, including music and comedy videos for all the Jewish holidays. View them on Your PC, Mac, Kindle Fire, iPad, iPhone, iTouch, Android Tablet and Smartphone. Click on the image above to peek inside and download a free sample. And now, a paperback edition for anyone who prefers a traditional book and doesn't mind typing the URLs instead of clicking on them.
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Add Laughter to Your Purim Celebration. Order Now From Amazon.com.
The Kustanowitz Kronikle - 25 Purim newsletters from 1988 to 2012 filled with parody, satire, and spoofs. Just published and available from Amazon.com. A great gift for the hosts of your Purim Seudah.
About the Blogger-in-Chief
Al Kustanowitz, Jewish Humor Central's Blogger-in-Chief, has collected Jewish humor even before there was an internet. For the last 25 years he has been editor and publisher of The Kustanowitz Kronikle. Back issues of the Purim Kronikle are available at www.kustanowitz.com/KRONMAIN.HTM.
Want to contact us? Just send email to akustan@gmail.com.
Please Lord, bless and watch over them.
ReplyDeleteBernie Cohn
SWhen thet protect Yisroel,I feel they somehow protect all Jews everywhere!
ReplyDelete...and SHANA TOVAH WITH BIG THANKS TO ALL OF YOU WONDERFUL SOLDIERS, MAY GOD AND ALL THE POWERS THAT BE PROTECT YOU FROM OUR BLOODY ENEMIES. MAY YOU DEFEAT THEM WITHOUT SHEDDING YOUR OWN BLOOD. AMEN....
ReplyDeleteAdela