Jewish Humor Central is a daily publication to start your day with news of the Jewish world that's likely to produce a knowing smile and some Yiddishe nachas. It's also a collection of sources of Jewish humor--anything that brings a grin, chuckle, laugh, guffaw, or just a warm feeling to readers.
Our posts include jokes, satire, books, music, films, videos, food, Unbelievable But True, and In the News. Some are new, and some are classics. We post every morning, Sunday through Friday. Enjoy!
Josef "Yossele" Rosenblatt (May 9, 1882 – June 19, 1933) was an Ashkenazi chazzan and composer. He was regarded as the greatest cantor of his time.
Rosenblatt was born on May 9, 1882, in the Russian Empire. The scion of a long line of cantors, Rosenblatt's devoutly religious upbringing prevented him from receiving
formal musical training at any of the great academies of his day. He
began his career as a member of the local synagogue choir. Quickly
lauded as a "wunderkind", or child prodigy, Rosenblatt's solo career was launched. At the age of 7, he moved with his family to Austria.
Rosenblatt's fame extended beyond the Jewish world earning him large concert fees, a singing role in the 1927 film The Jazz Singer, and the sobriquet "The Jewish Caruso".
Rosenblatt corresponded with many of the great tenors of his day. It is told that upon hearing Rosenblatt sing "Elli Elli", Enrico Caruso was so moved that he ascended the stage and kissed him.
We searched the internet for a video of Cantor Rosenblatt singing Kol Nidrei, but only could find audio recordings with accompanying photos. So that's what we're posting today.
Shai Abramson, Chief Cantor of the Israel Defense Forces, performs with the most
prominent cantors and musicians of our generation, and participates in
prayer services and in concerts throughout Israel and the world with a
variety of musical ensembles
He has presented his cantorial repertoire in Jewish
communities and concerts in the U.S. England, Canada, Australia, Italy,
France, Hungary, Poland, Romania, Bulgaria, Belgium, and more… with the
intention of developing and strengthening ties with Jewish communities
around the world, and intensifying connections with Israel and with the
IDF In this week before Rosh Hashanah, we're sharing a video in which Abramson sings Hineni He'ani, (I am poor in deed), a liturgical poem from the Rosh Hashanah Musaf service composed by Yossele Rosenblatt, accompanied by the Raanana Symphony Orchestra conducted by Ophir Sobol. The Hebrew text appears below the video.
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Here I am, utterly bereft, shuddering and afraid, in fear of the One who sits in judgement of the prayers of Israel.
I have come to stand before You and plead on behalf of Your people, Israel, who have sent me, as unfit and unworthy as I am.
I
beseech You, God of Abraham, God of Isaac, God of Jacob, Oh God, God of
mercy and grace, God of Israel, Mighty One, exalted and awesome - may
this path on which I tread - to stand and beseech mercy for myself, and
those who send me - come to success.
Don't
let them be punished for my failings, don't hold them guilty for my
sins, for I am due punishment for my failings. Let them not be
embarrassed by my failings. Let them not be ashamed of me and I won't be
ashamed of them. Receive my prayer as a prayer of one wise and decent,
of kind ways, great experience, of sweet voice and bound up in the ways
of creation. Hold back The Distractor, so he shouldn't distract me. Pour
out love towards us. Wipe away our sins in love. And overturn all our
woe and pain, the woe and pain of all Israel, into joy and delight, life
and peace. Love truth and peace.
Place
no stumbling block before my prayer. May it be Your will, God, God of
Abraham, God of Isaac and God of Jacob, the great mighty and awesome
God, God on high, the One who Is and Will Always Be, may each of the
Angels who receive prayer bring my prayers before the seat of Your
glory and spread them before You for the sake of all the just, kind,
pure and decent, and for the sake of the glory of Your great and awesome
name, for You are the One who hears the prayers of Your people Israel
in mercy. Blessed are you the One who hears prayer.
Every Friday we try to find a new version of one of the traditional songs that are sung in the synagogue or in the home to welcome Shabbat.
Shalom Aleichem is the liturgical poem that signals the start of this special 25 hour weekly respite from the workaday world.
We never know until Thursday what version of which song we'll be sharing with you on Friday. Sometimes it's Adon Olam, Yedid Nefesh, Eishet Chayil, Lechu Neranena, or Yigdal. This week we're sharing yet another version of Shalom Aleichem, as sung by Lucy Fishbein, Assistant Cantor at Congregation B'nai Jeshurun in Short Hills, New Jersey.
Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom!
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Thirty cantors who lead services year-round in Jerusalem synagogues also sing in the Jerusalem Cantors Choir, with performances in Israel and beyond. In July the choir traveled to Subotica, Serbia for the dedication of a renovated synagogue there. The cantors performed a full program of Israeli and Jewish songs that included Hatikvah, Oseh Shalom, Chiribim, Jerusalem of Gold, Al Kol Eleh, and many others. Here is their rendition of Am Yisrael Chai. Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom! A
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On Fridays we
usually post a musical welcome to Shabbat with a version of Shalom Aleichem,
Lecha Dodi, or Adon Olam. But this week we're skipping to the end of Shabbat and continuing the series of Havdalah services that we started in September. There's a
rich lode of musical endings to Shabbat, and Havdalah ceremonies around the
world reflect the traditional and local musical tastes of each location.
Here's
a video
to save for tomorrow night at the conclusion of Shabbat. It's a beautiful version of Havdalah sung by Shai Abramson, Chief Cantor of the Israel Defense Forces. The Havdalah Service took place at the King David Hotel with the FIDF Delegation to Israel.
IDF Chief Cantor Ltc. Shai Abramson Acompanied by the Rabbinical Choir Conducted by Ofir Sobol with Roey Shema at the piano. Shabbat Shalom and Shavua Tov. Enjoy! A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Adon Olam, the hymn that usually concludes the Shabbat morning service, has been sung in many diverse styles from traditional to Broadway and Beatles versions. But it has also been performed in concert. A few years ago, it was a featured part of a special concert to honor Moshe Stern, one of the great cantorial singers of the last century.
The concert was held
In Tel Aviv's Heichal Hatarbut (Mann Auditorium), together with the Tel
Aviv Philharmonic Orchestra. on April 9, 2014. Leading young cantors from around the world such as Yaakov Lemmer,
Netanel Hershtik, and Ushi Blumenberg also sang at the concert, conducted by Dr.
Mordechai Sobol.
Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom!
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On this Shabbat Chanukah we're sharing a medley of Adon Olam versions that was sung just a few weeks ago in the Hampton Synagogue in Westhampton, New York. The occasion was a 70th birthday concert in honor of Cantor Naftali Hershtik, the father of the synagogue's long time cantor, Netanel Hershtik. The two cantors were joined in the concert by four other cantors: Netanel Baram, David Berson, Azi Schwartz, and Gideon Zelermyer. Naftali Hershtik is a well known chazzan (cantor) and teacher. He was born in Hungary and came with his family to Israel at the age of three. He is descended from a long line of cantors and Rabbis, and was recognized as a cantorial prodigy from his early childhood, singing as a teen in concerts with Cantor Moshe Koussevitzky.
Enjoy and Shabbat shalom from Jerusalem.
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For the past year and a half we've been joining the many websites that observe Throwback Thursday. Since April 2016 we've been posting a nostalgic video clip to reminisce with you about some of our favorite comedians and their classic comedy sketches.
We think that the same nostalgia should be applied to the musical videos that we post each Friday to welcome Shabbat. So today we're starting a new series that we're calling Flashback Friday. Not every Friday post will be a flashback. When we come across a new rendition of Adon Olam, Shalom Aleichem, Lecha Dodi, or other liturgical mainstays, we'll keep sharing them with you. But they'll share the weekly spotlight with versions from years past.
We're kicking off the Friday Flashback series with a performance of Oseh Shalom by London's Shabbaton Choir in 2010. The choir sang in concert with the Young Chamber Orchestra of the Jerusalem Conservatory Hassadna
together with Chazanim Lionel Rosenfeld, Shimon Craimer, and Jonny Turgel.
Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom! A
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What do cantors do when they're not singing Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur liturgical compositions? If they do their cantoring in Los Angeles, they let their hair down and sing some popular karaoke. In this video, Los Angeles cantors sing a cover of "Stand By Me" in the style of Ben E.
King. It's the first of a series of Cantor Karaoke videos produced by the Jewish Journal of Los Angeles.
It features Cantor Nathan Lam of Stephen Wise Temple, Cantor
Joseph Gole of Sinai Temple, Cantor Chayim Frenkel of Kehillat Israel,
Cantor Shira Fox of Beit T’Shuvah, Cantor Yonah Kliger of Temple Judea
and Rabbi Cantor Alison Wissot of Temple Judea.
Enjoy!
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PLAY BUTTON IN THE VIDEO IMAGE TO START THE VIDEO. *Track used with permission by www.karaoke-version.com and
www.tencymusic.com
Since we started Jewish Humor Central in 2009, we have posted 26 versions of Adon Olam, the hymn that ends the Shabbat morning service in most congregations. But we haven't stopped searching for more renditions, so here is a new one from Cantor Daniel Benlolo of Kehillat Beth Israel, a Conservative egalitarian congregation in Canada's capital of Ottawa.
Cantor Benlolo harmonizes with Michael Malek as Simon and Garfunkel's Sound of Silence is intertwined with Adon Olam, accompanied by Aviva Lightstone and Ken Kanwisher.
The first 40 seconds are the original English words of Sound of Silence, and the Hebrew kicks in for the rest of the 3 and a half minute song. Enjoy and Shabbat shalom! A
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Tomorrow is the Fourth of July, a holiday that we celebrate with Americans of all religions and ethnic groups.
As
the world is riven today by national rivalries, hatreds, and acts of
unspeakable cruelty, we can take comfort in the knowledge that the
United States of America and Israel share a value system that is truly
exceptional.
A few years ago, Angela Buchwald and Julia Katz, the cantors of New York City's Central Synagogue, added a mashup of Hatikvah and America the Beautiful to a Shabbat service to give voice to the hope and vision that these two countries have shared from their birth. Have a happy Fourth tomorrow and enjoy the music.
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Every time we post a song by Mexican Cantor Moshe Mendelson (twice so far) we get an enthusiastic response and requests for more of his singing. So when we found Mendelson singing his version of the classic Yiddish song Rumenia, Rumenia, we knew we had to post it here. The song was composed and originally sung by Aaron Lebedeff in 1925. It's a song of nostalgic praise for old Romania, with its special foods and the
good life there before the war. There are references to mamalige (a cornmeal mush or cornbread), Karnatsel (a garlicky sausage or meat patty) Kashtaval or Kashkaval (cheese made from sheep’s milk) and other delicacies.
Since this was recorded in Mexico City, where Mendelson has been a cantor for the Ashkenazi Kehila in for 43 years, he is accompanied by a Mariachi band in full costume. Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Cantor Moshe Mendelson has been the Chazzan of the Ashkenazi Kehila in Mexico City for 43 years. In this video he teams up with a full Mariachi band to sing Ein Keilokeinu. Shabbat shalom. Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Manny Silver's day job is singing cantorial music and preparing children for their Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah at Temple Beth El in Hollywood, Florida. But when the lights go down low, he turns into a comedian, impressionist and singer.
Silver has a talent for mastering the cadence and inflection of many performers and politicians. In the six minute video below, he gives his impersonations of Johnny Cash, Bill Clinton, Kermit the Frog, Rodney Dangerfield, Barack Obama, Ronald Reagan, Richard Nixon, Jimmy Carter, Neil Diamond, Larry the Cable Guy, Judge Judy, Dr. Phil, Placido Domingo, Charlie Rich, The Big Bopper, Tony Bennett, and Jackie Mason. Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Last November, the rabbi and cantorial soloist of Temple Avodah, a Reform congregation in Oceanside, New York, led a Shabbat service utilizing the words and music of The Beatles in a very creative and meaningful way. Sure, there have been many services set to popular music and to songs from Broadway shows, and this wasn't the first use of Beatles songs in a synagogue service.
But Rabbi Uri Goren, the Chilean-born and educated spiritual leader,went a step further and delivered an eight-minute-long sermon called "Speaking Words of Wisdom" that creatively incorporated lyrics from eleven Beatles songs. Cantorial soloist Jessica Gubenko sang the Friday night service to seven Beatles songs. Shalom Aleichem - A Little Help From My Friends Lecha Dodi - Eight Days a Week Borchu - Hey Jude Mi Kamocha - Obladi Oblada V'Shomru - And I Love Her Shalom Rav - When I'm 64 Oseh Shalom (Kaddish) - Imagine Rabbi Goren took key excerpts from the lyrics of Let It Be, All You Need Is Love, Can't Buy Me Love, Help, Love Me Do, Nowhere Man, Yellow Submarine, Here Comes the Sun, From Me to You, Eight Days a Week, and The Long and Winding Road and turned them into a sermon on how to be happy and find God. Enjoy and Shabbat shalom! (A
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Beatles Shabbat Sermon - "Speaking Words of Wisdom"
What did Barbra Streisand, Ed Koch, and cantors preparing to sing Kol Nidre in their synagogue have in common? Guggle-Muggle (or Gogol-Mogol) -- the miracle drink that originated in the shtetls of Eastern Europe and made its way to America. The guggle-muggle pops up every few years in the Jewish blogosphere as a cure for the common cold, a candidate, along with chicken soup, for the title of "Jewish Penicillin" and as a performance enhancing substance for cantors and choir boys. Although there are endless variations on the ingredients used in this concoction, there seems to be a consensus that a guggle-muggle must contain a raw egg, honey, and a shot of whiskey. This week it surfaced in an article by Zachary Solomon in Jewniverse, a blog published by My Jewish Learning.com. In 2010 Elizabeth Alpern reported on the golden wonder in even more detail in the Forward's Jew and the Carrot blog. In September, Al Rosen, a World War II Veteran, added his guggle-muggle memories to the Wexler Oral History Project of the Yiddish Book Center. In a short interview segment, Rosen recalls how his father, a cantor, used the elixir to get his throat in shape to deliver a proper version of Kol Nidre. Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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There's still another week left to August, so it's hard to believe that Rosh Hashanah is only 12 days away. But this is a strange year calendar-wise, a year in which the first day of Chanukah falls on Thanksgiving Day in November. In the coming month we'll be focusing on the Chagim, the Jewish holidays that include Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Shemini Atzeret, and Simchat Torah. As usual, we'll be emphasizing humor and fun, including the Monday Joke to Start the Week, and we'll be looking for and sharing the best of the music videos and parodies that seem to be becoming a part of the holiday experience.
But we are in the middle of the month of Elul leading up to the most serious days in the Jewish calendar. Whether you call them the High Holidays, Days of Awe, or just Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, these special days also give us a chance to share some posts that reflect the spirituality of the season. How many armies do you know of that have a chief cantor? We know of one, and of course it's Israel. And Israel is the only country where you'll see its chief cantor, Shai Abramson, in military uniform singing with a similarly dressed choir of soldiers and a formally dressed Raanana Symphonette orchestra. This video was recorded last year in Tel Aviv's Great Synagogue. The selection is Unetaneh Tokef, a powerful liturgical poem that is the core element in the Musaf service on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur.
The video features footage of the Yom Kippur War and one of its heroes,
Brig. Gen. (res.) Avigdor Kahalani, who was a battalion commander in the
Armored Brigade, fought in the battle of the Valley of Tears and was
awarded a Medal of Valor. Enjoy, and repent. Shabbat shalom. (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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A good chazzan (cantor) is hard to find. And to paraphrase Some Enchanted Evening, the memorable song from Rodgers and Hammersten's South Pacific, "once you have found him, never let him go." David Presler, a chazzan in his own right, and also a recording artist, stage performer, and writer of song parodies, has
rewritten the song about two strangers meeting on a faraway isle as a paean to the chazzan who is so good that other shuls try to win him away.
David, who
will be leading High Holiday services at Tree of Life/Haverim in Lake
Worth, Florida, is also serving as rabbi and spiritual leader of the
Liberal Temple of Coconut Creek.
He lives in South Florida with his wife, singer Shira Flam. They perform as a duo, David and Shira, singing a range of songs from Broadway to opera to Yiddish to standards. Now he's under contract. No other shul can have him, Nor can they entice him to daven anywhere else. So sit for awhile and daven in style. The old time chazzones will bring you a smile. If there's a chazzan in your little town, Do what you can to keep that man around.
In this video, David is accompanied by Gary Lawrence, a celebrated pianist, band leader, and composer. David, Shira, and Gary are working on Songs of the Sunshine State, a new project featuring lost songs of Florida.
Enjoy and Shabbat shalom!
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At sundown on Tuesday evening, Jews all over the world will gather at their synagogues to attend the start of Yom Kippur services, beginning with the singing of Kol Nidrei. As we pointed out in a blog post two years ago, Kol Nidrei is a medieval
annulment of vows set to a melody composed as Opus 47 for cello and
orchestra by a German protestant named Max Bruch in 1881. There are almost as many recordings of Kol Nidrei as there are cantors to sing it. This year, lovers of cantorial music were given a special treat because the prayer is included in a new CD by Cantor Yitzchak Meir Helfgot and master violinist Itzhak Perlman titled Eternal Echoes: Songs and Dances for the Soul.
We found the Kol Nidrei cut from the CD on YouTube, along with a short video of Perlman and Helfgot preparing for the 2011 concert at which the CD was recorded. Both videos appear below. We hope they enrich your Yom Kippur experience. We will be attending Yom Kippur services in Jerusalem this week, so there will be no posts on Tuesday and Wednesday. We'll be back on Thursday with our usual Jewish Humor Central mix, with an emphasis on the holiday of Sukkot, which starts next Sunday evening. We wish all of our readers a G'mar Chatima Tova, a wish that even the buses in Jerusalem are carrying this week. (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Just Published: The Kustanowitz Kronikle - 35 Years of Purim Parody
Every Purim for the past 35 years we have published a Purim parody edition of The Kustanowitz Kronikle, covering virtually every aspect of Jewish life, and including parodies of hundreds of popular movies. This year we decided to retire the series and capture all the fun in a book that's just been published and is available at Amazon.com. It has every Purim issue of The Kustanowitz Kronikle from 1988 through 2022 in a full-color, full-size paperback book with hilarious headline stories and parody movie picks. Here are a few examples: TRUMP, NETANYAHU SWAP ROLES, COUNTRIES; NEW TALMUD VOLUME "VOTIN" FOUND IN IRAQ; JOINS "FRESSIN", "NAPPIN", TANTZEN","PATCHEN"; "JUDAICARE" PROGRAM PLANNED TO ENSURE THAT ALL JEWS HAVE SYNAGOGUE MEMBERSHIP; RABBIS CREATE TALMUD AMERICANI; NEW LAWS EXTEND HALACHA TO THANKSGIVING AND JULY 4; JEWISH ORGANIZATIONS WORLDWIDE UNITE TO STOP GLOBAL WARMING; FOCUS ON REDUCING HOT AIR; RABBIS TO REQUIRE SHECHITA FOR MANY FRUITS AND VEGETABLES
Jewish Humor Central Staff
Publisher and Editor-in-Chief:
Al Kustanowitz Food and Wine Editor:
Aviva Weinberg Israel Food and Wine Consultant Penina Kustanowitz Reporter and Photographer:
Meyer Berkowitz Reporter Phyllis Flancbaum
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"Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places" is now available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle editions
This book presents 150 anecdotes and associated video clips that reveal the myriad ways that Jewish culture, religion, humor, music, song, and dance have found expression in parts of the world that, at first glance, might not seem supportive of Jewish Life. It includes 50 videos of Hava Nagila being performed from Texas to Thailand, from India to Iran, and from Buenos Aires to British Columbia. Also highlighted are 34 international versions of Hevenu Shalom Aleichem, Adon Olam, Abanibi, and Tumbalalaika. Whether you’re reading the print version and typing in the video URLs or reading the e-book version and clicking on the links, you’ll have access to 150 video clips totaling more than 10 hours of video. Enjoy!
"Israel is a Funny Country" is now available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle editions
This book explores the multifaceted nature of humor in Israel, some of which is intentional and some of which is unintentional. Either way, the quirks of Israeli life contribute to making that life interesting and fulfilling. In the pages of this volume, we take a look at humorous slices of Israeli life, Israeli comedy, satire and parody, funny TV commercials, unusual stories about food, surprising rabbinic bans on daily activities, simchas as they can only be celebrated in Israel, and endearing aspects of Israeli culture. There are more than 120 anecdotes and links to video clips totaling more than six hours of video. We hope that these anecdotes and video clips give you a new and different insight into life in Israel, and encourage you to join in the fun by planning a visit to the land flowing with milk and honey.
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Jewish Humor Central logo merchandise is now available. Click on the image above to see the complete collection -- More than 100 items from tote bags, baseball caps, mugs, aprons, drinkware, T-shirts and sweatshirts, to pajamas and underwear.
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - Now Available in eBook and Paperback at Amazon.com
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - More than 400 video clips, including music and comedy videos for all the Jewish holidays. View them on Your PC, Mac, Kindle Fire, iPad, iPhone, iTouch, Android Tablet and Smartphone. Click on the image above to peek inside and download a free sample. And now, a paperback edition for anyone who prefers a traditional book and doesn't mind typing the URLs instead of clicking on them.
About the Publisher and Editor-in-Chief
A long-term devotee of Jewish humor, Al Kustanowitz has been collecting and sharing it even before there was an internet. In 2009, after a 36-year career at IBM managing new technology projects, he founded Jewish Humor Central (jewishhumorcentral.com. Through the blog he brings a daily dose of fun and positive energy to readers who would otherwise start the day reading news that is often drab, dreary, and depressing (subscribing is free). He has published 12 books on humor based on his more than 4,000 blog postings, each of which includes a video clip and his commentary.
He has presented more than 100 programs in South Florida and the Northeast on topics that include the great comedians and entertainers of the 20th century, funniest moments in film and television, flash mobs around the world, and composers and lyricists of the Great American Songbook.
He earned his bachelor's and master's degrees from the City University of New York and taught computer science courses at the Courant Institute of Mathematical Sciences at New York University. He is a member of the Advisory Board of the International Association of Yiddish Clubs.
You can contact Al via email at akustan@gmail.com.
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