Getting Ready for Yom Kippur with Avinu Malkeinu

Yom Kippur begins tonight with Kol Nidrei and ends tomorrow night with the singing of Avinu Malkeinu (Our Father, Our King.) The prayer is chanted at the end of the Neilah service before the last shofar blast of the High Holidays.

There are many versions of Avinu Malkeinu, but one of the most popular is the one composed by Max Janowski. Today we're sharing that version as sung a year ago in New York's Park Avenue Synagogue by cantors Azi Schwartz, Shira Lessek, and Rachel Brook. The words appear below the video.

We hope it puts you in the proper mood to experience a meaningful day of prayer and reflection. We'll be in synagogue all day tomorrow and back on Thursday with our usual Jewish Humor Central mix.

G'mar Chatimah Tovah!



Our father our king, hear our prayer
We have sinned before Thee
Have compassion upon us and upon our children
Help us bring an end to pestilence, war, and famine
Cause all hate and oppression to vanish from the earth
Inscribe us for blessing in the Book Of Life
Let the new year be a good year for us

Avinu malkeinu sh'ma kolenu
Avinu malkeinu chatanu l'fanecha
Avinu malkeinu chamol aleynu
V'al olaleynu v'tapenu

Avinu malkeinu
Kaleh dever v'cherev v'raav mealeynu
Avinu malkeinu kaleh chol tsar
Umastin mealeynu

Avinu malkeinu
Avinu malkeinu
Kotvenu b'sefer chayim tovim
Avinu malkeinu chadesh aleynu
Chadesh aleynu shanah tovah
 

A Joke to Start the Week - "A Yom Kippur Hole in One"

It's another Monday. Time for another joke to start the week. But it's also the day before Yom Kippur eve. What to do? How to be true to both traditions? There has to be a joke about Yom Kippur that will fit the bill. But where?

Enter the Internet, and Google. It wasn't easy, but we found one, and here it is, as told by a puppet on the Beliefnet website.

Here's the setup: A rabbi loved to play golf, but he never seemed to have time. He couldn't play on Shabbat, there was religious school on Sundays, and on days off something always comes up. But amidst all the activity of the High Holidays, he got a very early tee time before services on Yom Kippur. And then...

Enjoy!


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U.S. Ambassador Makes Emergency Trip to Jerusalem Shuk for Rosh Hashanah

A few days before Rosh Hashanah, U.S. Ambassador to Israel David Friedman discovered that the  jar of honey that he was going to use for the first night of the holiday was missing from his new office in Jerusalem. It probably got lost in the move from Tel Aviv. 

So, after a quick call to his wife, he ended up in Mahane Yehuda, the Jerusalem shuk, where he was able to find a solution to his problem and to wish a Shanah Tovah to all of us.

Enjoy!

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Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places: Jerusalem Cantors Choir Sings "Am Yisrael Chai" in New Synagogue in Serbia

Thirty cantors who lead services year-round in Jerusalem synagogues also sing in the Jerusalem Cantors Choir, with performances in Israel and beyond.

In July the choir traveled to Subotica, Serbia for the dedication of a renovated synagogue there. The cantors performed a full program of Israeli and Jewish songs that included Hatikvah, Oseh Shalom, Chiribim, Jerusalem of Gold, Al Kol Eleh, and many others.

Here is their rendition of Am Yisrael Chai. Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom!

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Throwback Thursday Comedy Special: Sid Caesar in "The Commuters: Small Apartment"

When Your Show of Shows was canceled in 1954, Sid Caesar started a new show called Caesar's Hour. The popular series of sketches called The Hickenloopers, about a bickering married couple, was recast as The Commuters, with Nanette Fabray playing Sid's wife as Imogene Coca had played in The Hickenloopers.

In this 1955 episode, "The Small Apartment," Bob and Nan Victor (Sid Caesar and Nanette Fabray) try to host a dinner party for three couples in a city apartment that's far too small for the task. Meanwhile, their guests continually needle them about their spacious suburban homes.
Enjoy!

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How "Old Jews Telling Jokes" Got Started

Old Jews Telling Jokes has been around since 2008, first as a web site, then as a CD, book, DVD, and an off-Broadway show that has been traveling all around the USA.

It was the creation of Sam Hoffman and Eric Spiegelman, who got the idea from listening to their parents telling jokes with their friends in central New Jersey.

In this NJTV News interview, Hoffman tells the story of how his idea blossomed into a source of laughter for so many people. 

Enjoy!

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Wishing All of Our Readers a Shanah Tovah - Happy New Year 5779

Thanks to our thousands of loyal subscribers and casual readers worldwide who have joined us during the year.

We started this blog on October 5, 2009 and it's been going strong with more than 2600 blog entries and almost 3 million page views over the last nine years.  

We appreciate your loyalty and we hope to keep bringing you a daily mix of Jewish humor in all of its forms -- traditional, eclectic, musical, unbelievable but true, and just funny, tempered with touches of nostalgia and Yiddishe nachas. 

5778 has been a great year for us -- a year of wonderful friendship, a year in which our nine books on Jewish humor have been selling on Amazon.com, and in which we performed 18 comedy shows and lectures in Florida, New York, New Jersey, and Montreal.

We'll be attending services for Rosh Hashanah tomorrow and Tuesday, and we'll be back posting again on Wednesday.  Here's wishing a happy, healthy, joyous, prosperous and funny New Year from our family to yours! 

Getting Ready for Rosh Hashanah with Psalm 150 (Halleluyah) Sung by Zamir Chorale

 

With Rosh Hashanah starting on Sunday evening, we're taking a break from pop music songs about the holiday and getting in the liturgical mood with a selection from the Shofarot section of the Musaf service.

It's a beautiful rendition of Psalm 150 (Halleluyah) with music by Louis Lewandowski. It's sung by the participants of the 28th Annual North American Jewish Choral Fesitval conducted by Maestro Mathew Lazar, Founder and Director of the Zamir Choral Foundation.

Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom!

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Throwback Thursday Comedy Special: Sid Caesar At the Movies

It's another Throwback Thursday and time for another comedy special from the past. Today we're going back 67 years to 1951 when Your Show of Shows was the weekly show you just had to watch. 

The regulars on the show were Sid Caesar, Imogene Coca, Carl Reiner, and Howard Morris. All four of them appear in this comedy sketch. 

Sid goes to the movies and settles into his seat. Before long he finds himself embroiled in an argument between a bickering couple played by Imogene Coca and Carl Reiner. Then the sparks fly.

Enjoy!

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#Throwback Thursday     #TBT

Here Come the Rosh Hashanah Videos: Technion Robots Celebrate Rosh Hashanah

The students and faculty of Israel's Technion - Israel Institute of Technology are always eager to demonstrate their scientific and engineering talents, and the Jewish holidays give them the opportunity to apply their knowledge in humorous ways.

In this video, filmed in the Technion's Cognitive Robotics Laboratory,  the Technion robots collaborate to produce a Rosh Hashanah party. First they set the table and then they bring flowers, apples and honey to celebrate the New Year. 

One robot selects a nice apple for Technion president Peretz Lavie to dip into honey, shake hands with one of the robots and wish all viewers a Happy New Year. The robot even attempts to blow a shofar, but we think it needs a bit more practice.

Enjoy!

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Here Come the Rosh Hashanah Videos: Boys Town Jerusalem Wishes a Happy New Year With Ya'aseh Shalom

Boys Town Jerusalem is one of Israel's premier institutions for educating the country's next generation of leaders in the fields of technology, commerce, education, the military and public service. 

Since its founding in 1948, BTJ has pursued its mission of turning young boys from limited backgrounds into young men with limitless futures. From Junior High through the College level, the three part curriculum at Boys Town - academic, technological and Torah - is designed to turn otherwise disadvantaged Israeli youth into productive citizens of tomorrow. 

Boys Town’s 18 acre campus is a home away from home for its more than 950 students. More than 7,500 graduates hold key positions throughout Israeli society.

For Rosh Hashanah, the Boys Town Jerusalem choir performs Ya'aseh Shalom. Enjoy!

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A Joke to Start the Week - "Tel Aviv Taxi"

Today we have another joke for you from Israel and one of our newest joke tellers, Max Nathans. Max was born in Holland and since 1969 has been living in kibbutz Matzuva in northern Israel.

As a kibbutz member he filled all sorts of jobs, and worked most of the time as a certified electrician.

Now retired, he is busy with various things and works as a volunteer in a center for people with special needs.

Here's the setup: One night was driving his taxi near Tel Aviv and suddenly next to Ramat Gan the taxi was hailed. Moshe stopped the car and in jumped a lady in the back seat. And then...

Enjoy!

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Here Come the Rosh Hashanah Videos: "We Call it Rosh Hashanah" by Jewbilation

There are many traditions associated with Rosh Hashanah, most of them going back to ancient times. But there's a new one that's only a few years old -- the appearance of music videos on the Internet specific to the holiday. 

Let's get started with a video by Jewbilation with new lyrics set to the '60s pop hit Georgy Girl. Jewbilation is the work of Dr. Richard Seaman and Andrew Dimond, creators of the Simon and Garfunkel parody, Sounds of Shabbos that we posted back in 2012.

Richard and Andrew grew up with little or no Jewish observance. They became more involved in Jewish life by participating in programs by Aish Hatorah, Hinenni, the Manhattan Jewish Experience and Congregation Kehilat Jeshurun. 

Enjoy!

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Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places: Welcoming Shabbat with Adon Olam in Papua, Indonesia

There is a spark of Jewish life in some of the cities in Indonesia, the largest Muslim country in the world.

Indonesian Jews face the challenge of declaring a religion on their government ID cards. Every citizen over the age of 17 must carry a card, which includes the holder's religion. Indonesia only recognizes six religions: Islam, (non-Catholic) Christianity, Catholicism, Buddhism, Hinduism and Confucianism. It does not officially recognize Judaism and other religions.

An estimated 20,000 descendants of Jews still live in Indonesia, though many are losing their historical identity. Since most of Indonesian Jews are actually Jews from Southern Europe and Middle East Area, languages which are spoken by Indonesian Jews are Indonesian, Malay, Arabic, Hebrew, Portuguese and Spanish. 

There are few synagogues and few congregants, but Shabbat and Jewish holidays are celebrated in some Indonesian cities, such as this group singing Adon Olam to bring in the Shabbat in Papua (a city on the western side of the island, not to be confused with Papua New Guinea which occupies the eastern side.)

Enjoy and Shabbat shalom!

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Throwback Thursday Comedy Special: Sid Caesar and Imogene Coca in The Bus to Riverdale

Today's nostalgia trip takes us back 64 years to 1954 and a classic episode from Your Show of Shows, the 90 minute weekly sketch comedy series featuring Sid Caesar, Imogene Coca, and Howard Morris.

This episode shows the talent of Howard Morris, who is less well remembered today than the rest of the cast of Your Show of Shows, but only because he stood in the company of giants like Sid Caesar,  Imogene Coca (and Carl Reiner, who is not in this sketch).

In this episode, Sid and Imogene are waiting for their bus in a bus station when Howard approaches them and asks which bus goes to Riverdale. The ensuing chaos is a prime example of the ensemble comedy that made the program a must to watch every week.

Enjoy!

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#Throwback Thursday    #TBT

Remembering Neil Simon, Master Playwright of Comedy and Middle Class Life

Neil Simon, who died on Sunday at 91, was one of the United States' most prolific and commercially successful playwrights. Whether delivering humor or drama, Simon possessed a rare understanding of the frictions his audience experienced in their most intimate relationships. 

Simon was best known for his many comedies and slices of Jewish middle class life, including The Odd Couple, Brighton Beach Memoirs, Biloxi Blues, and Lost in Yonkers. He was also part of the writing team for Sid Caesar's Your Show of Shows, together with fellow writers Mel Brooks, Carl Reiner,and other famous comedy greats.

Many tributes to Simon have been published and posted over the last few days. Today we're sharing one in which PBS reporter Jeffrey Brown looks back at his career, with insight from Washington Post theater critic Peter Marks.

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The Jews are Coming - Noah is Sued by Gilgamesh Lawyer (Parody)

In 2014 Israeli satire on TV took a bold step forward with the airing of a new series of sketches called HaYehudim Ba'im (The Jews Are Coming).
Written by Natalie Marcus and Asaf Beiser, the show asks questions about everything, from the Bible to Ben Gurion to the Ashkenazi leadership. Their approach is to  go into the texts and make you think. They say that they give all their subjects a critical look, but they're not attacking, just giving the story a fresh, modern look.

The series ran for three seasons on Israeli TV, all in Hebrew. Some of the half-hour episodes were divided into video clips and published on YouTube with English subtitles. We found a few new ones and we'll continue to share them with you. Today we're posting a parody that reimagines the scene where Noah tells his sons that God spoke to him and told him to build an ark to survive the flood that is coming to destroy all mankind.

In the parody, Noah is served with a summons by a lawyer representing Gilgamesh of Mesopotamia, the fifth king of the city of Uruk and author of the best seller Epic of Gilgamesh. Noah is being sued for copyright infringement because his flood story is the same as that detailed in the Gilgamesh book.

This video clip, like all the others in the series, may offend some readers who are not open to satirical interpretations of the scriptures and satirical views of Jewish life through the ages, but we believe that there's a place for humor everywhere and we hope you'll find the satire amusing.

Enjoy!

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A Joke to Start the Week - "Two Antennas"

It's another Monday, and time to share another Joke to Start the Week. We're still processing some of the classic jokes that we collected from the volunteer joke tellers who vacationed last month at the Berkshire Hills Eisenberg Adult Vacation Center in Copake, New York. The season has ended, but the happy memories linger on.

Retired accountant Ted Klein had as much fun telling his jokes as we had listening to them and recording them. Today we're posting another one of Ted's jokes.

Here's the setup: Two antennas meet on the roof and fall in love. And then... 

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